Travelogue Part 3

 Days 3 and 4 covered 4 states: Kentucky, Tennessee, Mississippi, and Arkansas.

Did I mention that we saw some strange things in Kentucky? 

Transylvania University, castles, caves, giant chickens... we had a great time!

Tennessee was also marvelous, partly because they had really great BBQ,

but mostly because Fr. Mark drove up from New Orleans and met us there!



We arrived in the afternoon, and left after breakfast the next morning, but in between we talked for eight hours!

He's one of our favorite people to talk to because our interests overlap in  almost every sphere: Catholicism, science fiction, politics, history, literature, humor, quirky accents, culture, you name it!

We were also right next to Graceland, home of Elvis Presley, although we didn't visit, $35 a person being a bit steep. The BBQ place was a block or two away, and proudly boasted that ELVIS ATE HERE, so that was close enough.

Meanwhile, back at the hotel, I amused myself by saying that our four teen children would stay in one hotel room, and the other half of the family would stay in the other.
 

Large Family

I have at last reached the cherished dream of having a large family: I now have four teen children (plus some others).

If that didn't make sense, say it aloud.

I am enjoying this immensely!

Me: I've got four teen children downstairs watching a movie.

The Emperor:Where are the rest of them?

Me: Watching Ultraman on my laptop.


Although it's not completely perfect.

Me (calling out to the back of the van): How are my four teen children doing?

Chorus: Great!

Me: And how are the rest of my children?

Quiet voice: They were delicious!


I've also figured out that by the end of all this, I will have had six teen children!

Are You Done Yet?

I used to get that question a lot when all 6 of mine were little.  I think people were just a little awed/terrified/amused at seeing me in the store with the baby in a sling, toddler in the cart seat and two kids hanging on  each side of the cart.

 I still get that question from time to time.

My answer to, "Are you done yet/ do you want more?" has always been, "Yes, we'd love another baby, but you don't get babies just by wishing."  Meaning, I don't know if we'll be able to have another.  Which is true and it refocuses the discussion with the view that each child is not only valuable, but rare in the sense that you you may or may not be able to have even one. 

It also turns out to be a kind answer when the person asking isn't able to have kids.  About half the time the person who asked the question then shares that they weren't able to have children, and many others reveal that they couldn't have as many as they wanted.

And then we lost the 4 babies after our number 6, so I've been really glad that has been my answer!

I know there are a lot of more clever replies out there, and they're fun to read, but I'm not sure they really help anyone, especially since so many people asking are coming from a place of pain. 

I'll admit, my answer to, "Are they all yours?" was, "Just the cute, well behaved ones." Which, I (and the cashier who had asked) thought was funny.

And once, when quite harried at the grocery store, I was asked if I were babysitting and I told them that I was NOT crazy enough to take 6 EXTRA kids to the grocery store.

But I have never gotten a mean question about my kids, unlike many friends with large families, and my response to a rude comment would be different.  It amazes me how some moms get targeted in front of their children with mean/rude comments (like "don't you know what causes that/were any of them accidents/don't you have a TV?").  It's not a matter of bad kid behavior attracting those kinds of comments, either.  My friend that gets the most mean spirited comments has the best publicly behaved kids I know.

I think it's a matter of diffidence versus confidence.

I do not look like an easy target for mean people. Oh, I'm (hopefully) pleasant enough, but I don't look like a person who would be "too nice" to respond to a snarky comment. My friend looks (and really is) too nice to respond in kind.  I once did get a person who was about to make a rude remark, and I just looked at her, waiting.  She changed her mind and turned away.

But I did once get reported (anonymously, of course) as having an unlicensed daycare! :D